Let man not separate
This week, Sam and I attended our first pre-marital counselling session with the minister who is marrying us come February. It was a particularly special session for me, mainly because that minister also happens to be my Dad.
One of the things we learnt that night was that the essence of marriage is the union between a man and a woman. This might sound obvious, but often we can mistakenly think that the essence of marriage is about other things: having a family, being in love, working out the biblical principles of "manhood" and "womanhood", or leadership and submission.
Although these things are important, they aren't the essence of marriage. Ultimately, marriage is about God joining a man and a woman together, as they in turn make promises to uphold that union. I love the passion and joy with which this union is described in Genesis:
Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the manThe man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman, for she was taken out of man." For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
Another helpful pointer dad gave us was to think about our priorities when it comes to the wedding ceremony. A valuable ceremony, according to Dad, is one that inspires and helps the couple to keep the promises they make to one another. Although God joins them together, they must also work at keeping that union. A great ceremony will be something they can look back on to encourage them to do this.
4 comments:
Might I also suggest that a great ceremony is one that inspires the community you live with (assuming they attend the ceremony) to help you be a godly, committed couple. I think we place a lot of value on the couple but not enough on the community that supports them; the ceremony should reflect the community's love for the couple as much as the couple's love for each other.
And it helps to write your own music - seriously, not a dry eye in the house if you sing a homemade song to each other.
the ceremony should reflect the community's love for the couple as much as the couple's love for each other.
I disagree. That being said, I am very glad that a community of people will be present at our marriage ceremony, as well as sharing in our marriage in the future. I don't think it's as important as the couples love for each other - what about Adam and Eve? They had union - God joined them together - but there is no community there for them? Are they any less married?
Christopher, if Sam and I sang there would definitely be tears...but maybe for a different reason!
You guys have heaps of time to write your own song don't you??!!
Christopher - I don't think that should be general wedding advice - only relatively few people in this world can actually write songs with ease, let alone very hard work. Probably not the best thing to be focussing on when preparing for marriage.
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